Discharged and free....

Oh my, its been about 2 weeks now since I was completely discharged from Camhs, and safe to say it really has been so hard. I dont like to tell people this though, because I dont want to worry anyone, I have been doing well considering, its more just the temptation to do things thats really in my face and sometimes its soo hard to resist, but so far i have resisted. I think now that I'm on my own I know i can get away with more, and that part of me that still wants to be ill is like OH MY GOD THIS IS AMAZING!! but in the end its up to me now, its up to me to fijutght it, and i am going to, i really am, some days are just harder than others, and thats why im writing in here today because im feeling really low and well i feel scared, im scared of whats going on in my head, im scared that i'll give in and let it eat me up, because thats always the easier option, but urgh i dont know, i must keep fighting, i really must....