Monday, 16 April 2012

pros & cons.

I decided to make a list of the pros and cons of giving into my illness, and safe to say I was shocked at the amount of cons I came up with, so I decided I'd share it with you guys in the hope that you may be able to help me come up with more. It oftens helps me to see these things written down, like having evidence against what the voice in my head is telling me, because right now, this is one loud voice


Pros & cons to letting anorexia win.

I will be thin.


I'll be miserable, tired and hungry all the time.

Most likely end up in hospital

Be up at royal edinburgh all my life

Not be able to go to uni and become a nurse

Wont be well enough to go out with friends

too unwell to go on holidays

wont get married as I'll spend all my time in and out of hospitals

not be able to have my own kids

I'll end up pushing away all my friends

I'll have to watch my friends go on and make something of their lives while I'm stuck at home on bed rest too ill to leave the house, they'll move on without me

My family will be constantly having a go at me trying to make me eat

I'll be in constant pain, have no energy and feel weak and dizzy all the time

I will die young

wont be able to be a part of Minding Me

Will never be able to enjoy food

Wont get boobs

wont be able to go shopping and will forever live in childrens clothes

Everyone around me will be constantly worried about me

My life will revolve around lying, exercising, hospital appointments and starving.

Now thats a lot, right?!

1 comment:

  1. That is a lot, and I think it's really great that you did this! I wonder if it's worth writing another version of this cons list, reframed positively: things that you will be or have if you don't give up. Eg "I'll be happy, have more energy and love myself"; "I'll stay out of hospital"; "I'll be able to go to uni and become a nurse" etc. I don't know if that'd help you but for me I think it'd make a big difference to have them worded positively, to motivate me to keep fighting and have positive things to aim for.

    Either way though, write this out by hand really big & stick it up somewhere you can't miss it.

    Much love beautiful x x