Tuesday, 1 May 2012
time to say goodbye to the old me..
Sometimes it takes someone else to point something out to us for us to realise that perhaps what we are doing isn't the right thing, or isn't helpful to us or them in any way, an outsider looking in can sometimes be all we need to give us the kick start to changing the little things.
And this is what I am doing now, starting with twitter. As some of you might know I've been on twitter for some time, used it as an outlet, a place to talk to other people who were going through the same thing, it was like another little world I lived in. But I realise now that it wasn't always a helpful thing for me, it was feeding into my eating disorder, focusing on the negatives and being around so many people who also were battling the same illness. They were lovely people dont get me wrong, but I need to leave that part of me behind if I am to say goodbye to my eating disorder for good, I need to free myself of all unhelpful 'anorexic' things and habbits one by one, and so I deleted my twitter account this morning.
I know it's only one little thing, but I know deep down that it is what's best for me in my recovery, I need to surround myself with the people who love me and know me for being ME, not the anorexic girl, I don't want that tag anymore. I want to be known as ME, the real me, the one my true friends know is in there somewhere, and she's dying to come out. Bit by bit, day by day, she will start to shine again...